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  • 5 days ago | Hey, You!

    You are the needy, neurotic, confusing weirdo I had the misfortune of meeting on OkCupid. You told me you didn't want a girlfriend but wasted three months of my time dumping your insignificant problems on me and sharing uninteresting details of yo...

  • 12 days ago | Hey, You!

    Apparently, I was in the way of your need for speed. You rushed around me, slammmed your car into park at the light, ran around to my window and started screaming at me. "Shit, you're really big," you said when I got out of my car. "Yes," I answer...

  • 18 days ago | Hey, You!

    You're the middle-aged jackass on a motorcycle in full leather regalia that was too impatient to drive like a normal person on the narrow streets of UC Irvine, so you decided to pass slower moving cars on the right. When you got to me, you attempt...

  • 26 days ago | Hey, You!

    You were my landlord for five years. I won't deny I was very happy living in your house, even when you were giving me a hard time. I only hated the fact I couldn't bring anyone over. Well, I have to confess I didn't need to because I was having...

  • 1 month ago | Hey, You!

    You were the waiter at the pseudo-ritzy marina-front restaurant. Having just finished brunch, you offered me a refill on my coffee, to which I happily obliged, only to have you wrap your hand around the mouth of my coffee cup when you poured from ...

  • 1 month ago | Hey, You!

    You are the homeless fellows who were holding signs seeking financial help one recent Sunday morning at strategic intersections in Huntington Beach. If I had something other than plastic in my wallet, I would have given each of you a buck or three...


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