Email Author AMANDA PARSONS

2008 Stories by AMANDA PARSONS

• Killer Cuisine

  published December 25, 2008

  The holidays are for family. And now that you’ve spent the last few days surrounded by yours, no doubt there are some unhealthy visions of... More >>

• Giant Paintball Park

  published December 25, 2008

  There’s no substitute for coming home after a long hard days work, slipping into some fat pants and picking up the good ol’ remote... More >>

• All Inclusive

  published December 25, 2008

  In the ‘60s when Ron Karenga began Organization US (a rival to the popular Black Panthers), changed his name to “Maulana ,” meaning... More >>

• Chop Chop

  published December 25, 2008

  Everyone remembers watching their first kung-fu movie. Those American voices over mismatched lip movements and displays of superhuman strength and... More >>

• King of Hearts

  published December 25, 2008

  BB King is getting old—really old—but the thrill isn’t gone from the 83-year-old’s soul. His legendary status in the rhythm... More >>

• Night Owls

  published December 18, 2008

  Animals are usually asleep at night time—unless they're nocturnal—so most zoo visiting hours end when the sun goes down, cutting... More >>

• Cool Kids

  published December 18, 2008

  Sometimes sticking to the status quo can prevent you from taking that leap into your unconventional passions. We all know that it did for Troy and... More >>

• Goonies

  published December 11, 2008

  In 1985, Steven Spielberg had a stroke of genius. He combined a disfigured man-child with a candy bar fetish, a move known as the Truffle Shuffle,... More >>

• Mighty Words

  published December 11, 2008

  Eddie Sanchez may share the same surname as a messy bedroom maneuver but don’t bring that up with him unless you enjoy extreme physical pain.... More >>

• Thats the Ticket

  published December 4, 2008

  Everyone who has ever heard of Andy Dick wants to punch him in the face. So when Jon Lovitz gave Dick a proper beat-down in 2007 at... More >>

• Spacing Out

  published December 4, 2008

  If college taught us anything, it’s that nothing inspires recreational drug use like music accompanied by images of outer space. But... More >>

• Passages

  published November 27, 2008

  Considered by many to be the birthplace of humanity, Africa has a vast history that is largely unrecorded. Photographers Carol Beckwith and Angela... More >>

• Alligator Tears

  published November 27, 2008

  Want to bring a woman to tears? Have her explain the story behind Robert Harling’s 1989 theater classic Steel Magnolias. This tale of... More >>

• Just a Nibble

  published November 20, 2008

  The witch from Hansel and Gretel is terribly misunderstood. She spent years building her dream house out of gingerbread, frosting and gum... More >>

• Bacon Brothers

  published November 20, 2008

  Remember that movie Wild Things? Of course you do. It's the one where Denise Richards makes out with Neve Campbell in the pool and Kevin... More >>

• Sound Salvation

  published November 13, 2008

  Ah, the ‘40s—a time when radio was the lifeline for Americans, providing news, music and entertainment, much like television does today.... More >>

• Oprah-Approved

  published November 13, 2008

  Oprah Winfrey is one of the few people in this world who can do whatever the fuck she wants and get away with it, no questions asked. You want to... More >>

• Grinch's Perspective

  published November 13, 2008

  It’s November—time to go out and kill a stately evergreen that has been around since before any of us were born so we can decorate its... More >>

• BYO Blood

  published November 6, 2008

  There was a time not too long ago when westerns weren’t just fodder for children’s-television programming, but also an actual way of... More >>

• Ra Feud

  published November 6, 2008

  Imagine, if you will, a falcon. Now, imagine that this falcon can totally fly, but instead he spends his days traveling around the sky in a boat.... More >>

• Civic Duty

  published October 30, 2008

  Tuesdays are such a yawn. You might as well stay inside all day—unless there’s something extremely important happening, like, say . . .... More >>

• Burrrrrp!

  published October 30, 2008

  Nothing goes with a good game of tackle football like breasts. And wings. Yeah, we’re talking about chicken here. So what better place to... More >>

• Ruling and Regulating

  published October 30, 2008

  In the early ‘90s a new form of gangsta rap that blended funk music with slow harmonic tones and anti-authoritarian lyrics emerged on the... More >>

• Spacing Out

  published October 23, 2008

  Space: the vast vacuum of unknown depth, filled with countless secrets unknowable by man, at least for now. Sadly, funding for space exploration... More >>

• Pretty Talk

  published October 23, 2008

  Drugs, art school, chain smoking, odd jobs, homosexuality, family, death, love and elves. These are just some of the many topics covered in David... More >>