"The OsCene—Contemporary Art and Culture in OC"opens today at the Laguna Art Museum. Sure, the title's clunky (it's supposed be read "OhSeen"), but the survey of local artists in pretty much every medium but goat fucking includes painting, drawing, sculpture, photography, multimedia installations, video/film, sound/music, architecture, fashion and tattoo art. Open 11 a.m.-5 p.m. daily. Thru Feb. 27, 2005. $7-$9. Laguna Art Museum, 307 Cliff Dr., Laguna Beach, (949) 494-8971.
Hipsters, get your guns. The United Starving Artists—including Matt Purvis, Rebecca Burton and Joe Rodriguez, among, like, 10 others—gather the kids at the old barn and put on a show! With beverages! With DJs Sullivan, Joplin and Steven Dimitri! 6:30 p.m.-1 a.m. Free. Plush Design Lab/Cafe, 207 N. Harbor Blvd., Fullerton, (714) 738-5100.
Now here's a fine mess we've gotten ourselves into! How on earth would we ever decide between Holiday Havoc at Anaheim Stadium (with Cypress Hill, Tribe Called Quest, Jurassic 5, and others. Noon. Call for ticket prices. All ages. 2000 Autry Way, Anaheim, 714-740-2000;www.ticketmaster.com);Barry Manilow at the Arrowhead Pond of Anaheim (8 p.m. $35-$125. All ages. 2695 E. Katella Ave., Anaheim, 714-704-2400;www.arrowheadpond.com); English Beat and the Untouchables at the Galaxy Concert Theatre (7:30 p.m. $16.50. All ages. 3503 S. Harbor Blvd., Santa Ana, 714-957-0600;www.galaxytheatre.com);and George Clinton and P-Funk at the House of Blues (9 p.m. $40. All ages. 1530 S. Disneyland Dr., Anaheim, 714-778-2583; www.hob.com)? How??? I suppose I'll just have to choose by whichever publicist calls up and offers me the most free seats. (714) 550-5900. All right, then. (Arrowhead Pond of Anaheim, come on down!)
Because she ain't dead yet! Carol Channing, along with some "special guests" I've never heard of (Tony Martin, Pete Barbutti, The Pied Pipers and the Big Band All Stars) performs songs from Gentlemen Prefer Blondes; Thoroughly Modern Millie; and Hello, Dolly! 3 p.m. $25-$55. Cerritos Center, 12700 Center Court Dr., Cerritos, (800) 300-4345; www.cerritoscenter.com.
I don't know. Do something. Can't you think for yourself for one freaking day?
Lorna Luft, daughter of Judy Garland and some dude, pays tribute to her mother with Songs My Mother Taught Me. That sounds nice. My mom taught me to cuss like a trucker. 7:30 p.m. $68. Orange County Performing Arts Center, Founders Hall, 600 Town Center Dr., Costa Mesa, (714) 556-2122; www.ocpac.org.
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Because it's your fault. Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) will be meeting (at a Methodist church! In Laguna Woods, no less!) to sit around, stunned, and wonder what happened to all that great togetherness from last year, that short-lived San Francisco spring when gay folks were getting married and people from around the country were wiring florists to deliver flowers to the next couple they saw standing at City Hall, and everybody was crying tears of civil-rights joy. Now? Not so much. PFLAG is a secular organization that celebrates diversity and envisions a society that embraces everyone, including those of diverse sexual orientations and gender identities. 7 p.m. United Methodist Church, Sun Room, 24442 Moulton Pkwy., Laguna Woods, (949) 380-7035.
Hay Fever. Here's a nice play about some horrible crazy in-laws. Do you suppose it'll be more like the Ben Stiller vehicle Meet the Parents, Ben Stiller comedy Flirting With Disaster, or Ben Stiller-with-just-sort-of-a-supporting-role The Royal Tenenbaums? 7:30 p.m. $7-$9. Huntington Beach Historic Theater, 1905 Main St., Huntington Beach, (714) 536-2514, ext. 602. —Rebecca Schoenkopf