Thurs., April 28: Are you young and hip and purty? Are you, at any rate, younger, hipper and purtier than I? Then grab your board and get to OCMAfor OrangeCrushNights.This one's got skate demos (as always) and The Rolling Blackouts(Chris Ziegler's like favoritest band; in fact, I think he might even be in it) tearing up your shit. Also, if you've got weed, you should definitely bring that too. 6-9 p.m. Orange County Museum of Art, 850 San Clemente Dr., Newport Beach, (949) 759-1122; www.ocma.net.
Fri.: Are you old and stuffy and shit? Me too! Let's go together to see Tony Award- and Emmy Award-winning actress Bebe Neuwirth(Lilith from Cheers) doing the sexy cabaret of Kurt Weill (Threepenny Opera) and Kander and Ebb (Cabaret, Chicago). I've yet to see her, but she's supposed to be even more talented than Wayne Brady—as if that were possible! 8 p.m. $36-$66. Orange County Performing Arts Center, Segerstrom Hall, 600 Town Center Dr., Costa Mesa, (714) 556-2122; www.ocpac.org.
Sat.: I'm going to leave this bit of Nick Schou's Politics listings (from our very own shiny Calendar!) as is, because it cannot be improved upon. "Coffee Chat. Hey, kids, Congressman Roycehas been named chairman of the House Terrorism Subcommittee. Do you know any terrorists? He'd sure like to know. Actualterroristsnot invited." 9 a.m. LosAlamitosCityCouncilChambers,3191KatellaAve.,LosAlamitos,(714)992-8081.
Sun.: I was going to invite you to the opera today, but it's a collegeopera, and it's a Poulencthang I ain't never heard of (and don't even know how to say), so it really can't be that good. Instead, let's all gay it up and head to the Pond for Champions on Ice. Michelle Kwan! Irina Slutskaya(heh heh!)! Sasha Cohen! Wait—SashaCohen?Are you all thinking what I'm thinking? You are if y'all have HBO. 3 p.m. Visit website for ticket prices. Arrowhead Pond of Anaheim, 2695 E. Katella Ave., Anaheim, (714) 740-2000; www.championsonice.com.
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Mon.: MartiniBlueshas an Open Blues Jam. I know. I don't like blues either, but it's that or scrubbing your grout. Besides, this is like Barry Koltnow's (from the Register) favorite place ever! Maybe you'll see him there! Wait! Wait! Come back! 8 p.m. Martini Blues, 5874 Edinger Ave., Huntington Beach, (714) 840-2129; www.martiniblues.com.
Tues.: The DirtJointbrings the best Americana to hit OC since that roadhouse on Carbon Canyon done went and got paved. This week's featured rootsiness is The Evangenitals, Paul Chesne Bandand The Black Tongued Bells. 9 p.m. $5. 21+. Detroit Bar, 843 W. 19th St., Costa Mesa, (949) 642-0600.
Wed.: Koo's, as always, is crunchy and cultural and good for you. This month's TenbytenPerformanceLab(where each performance piece is no longer than 10 minutes) features Mike McCollum, Michael Robertsand CarrieSeitzinger(poetry), MaggieWellsand FilipCondeescu(dance), Ashley Ventri, Stephanie Haffnerand SarahGreen(music), and CristinaNavaand GoretidaSilva(performance art). Cool? No! Koo! Okay, I apologize. No, seriously. I'm sorry. 8 p.m. $6. Koo's Art Caf, 540 E. Broadway, Long Beach, (562) 491-7584; www.koos.org.
Thurs., May 5 There is nowhere else to be for CincodeMayothan at the GalaxyConcertTheatrefor everybody's favorite Mexican punk supergroup/cover band, Manic Hispanic. With The Johns, Booby Trapand ADHD. 8 p.m. $17. All ages. Galaxy Concert Theatre, 3503 S. Harbor Blvd., Santa Ana, (714) 957-0600; www.galaxytheatre.com.