Yeah, you, the naked lady at the gym. I suppose in this day and age, when nobody gives a damn about privacy and people live their lives on the Internet 24/7, it’s too much to ask for you to show some modesty and wrap a damn towel around yourself in the locker room.
I should probably give you credit for being so confident, given that you’re not exactly Gisele. But do ya think you could step back from the waxing? Because I am now more intimately acquainted with the excruciating details of your pubic anatomy than I am with my spouse’s.
I don’t even know your name, and I still feel like I should buy you dinner after all you’ve shown me.
Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations—changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent—to “Hey, You!” c/o OC Weekly, 2975 Red Hill Ave., Ste. 150, Costa Mesa, CA 92626, or e-mail us at email@example.com.