DISCO DERVISH WHEELS! Origin: Born with a mirror-ball rattle in her hand. Status: Founder, OC Roller Girls. Mantra: Cheeky, not slutty. Turned on to derby after: Seeing a roller girl lift up her skirt, blow kisses to the audience and leave with a bloody nose at the end of the night. Best props: Corsets and red wigs. Favorite Valentines’s Day: “In third grade, there was this boy who’d chase me around, and he bought me this little card and some bubble bath—that’s when guys said, ‘I love you’ pretty fast!” Turn-on: Brains.
KATE FOX HEELS! Origin: A proper British equestrian lady. Status: Founder, OC Underground Burlesque Society. Bestmove: The Booty Drop. Best routine: “Snow White biting into the apple and falling under a spell of crazed sexuality, writhing all over the stage.” Favorite prop: Sparkly Union Jack pasties—“a real pain in the ass to make.” Celebrity crush: French actress Eva Green. Would attempt roller derby if . . . she could skate and wasn’t a wuss.
Brik Wall and Dizzy Von Damn!: That's how they role
MACHINE GUN JUBBLIES WHEELS! Origin: Austin Powers fembot. Status: Fresh meat—first bout last September with the Crash Test Bunnies. Favorite uniform: Fishnets, thigh-high socks, garters and a mini derby skirt. Feelings about love: Owns a T-shirt that reads, “Cupid is a Rat Bastard.” Perfect derby night: “Make the winning score after knocking someone into the announcers’ table and walk out with my fishnets unripped.” Perfect Valentine’s Day gift: Heritage Softail Harley-Davidson. Best reply to a pick-up line: “I once told a guy I was a female impersonator. He didn’t believe me, so I pointed at my feet, and he ran off. My size 10s saved me.” Sexiest food: A Carl’s Jr. Western Bacon Cheeseburger—“if you can eat it while riding a mechanical bull.” Turn-off: Guys who don’t “manscape.”
This article appeared in print as "Wheels, Heels & Sex Appeal."