Britney Spears

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The harsh spotlight of child stardom can be rough, especially when our young celebs grow older, lose their cuteness factor and become irrelevant. Take Britney Spears for example. The Louisiana native went from Disney Mousekateer and pop mega-stardom to a head-shaving vag-flasher who had her children taken by court order. But hey, in tough times like these, hard working Americans need a good comeback story. And Britney, complete with hair extensions and a new album, is bringing it to us with her Circus tour. Featuring flashy costumes (with nipple tassels!), hip dance moves and new songs describing her recent "personal journey", our favorite pop princess/train wreck is reclaiming her throne amongst celebrity royalty. Witness the transformation before she turns to adopting African babies and we forget all about this "mental instability" nonsense and busy ourselves with stories of Hollywood's next public melt down, starring Miley Cyrus.
Sun., April 19, 8 p.m.; Mon., April 20, 8 p.m., 2009