You see, it’s not all about you or me or the darkie across the street whose gaze I’m avoiding. It’s about my readers. Always has been. As my former colleague Phil Garlington wrote in his Weekly cover story (“True Life at the Register,” Jan. 12, 2001), “The ‘core readership’ is Register code for the nub of loyal South County subscribers—elderly, white, conservative, morally square—that columnist Gordon Dillow speaks to as he goes about (as somebody said jokingly) comforting the comfortable and afflicting the afflicted.”

So I depart Grand Avenue knowing someone really loves me. But not in a Dillowlicker way. Unless . . . unless I’m . . . unless I’m a . . . Let me think about that. And then I’ll get back to me.

*As told, in a dream, to Matt Coker.

James McHugh

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