[Hey, You!] Bicycle Thief

I was on the Disneyland bus, half-asleep, minding my own business, going to spend a little quality time with my litle girl when I opened my eyes. That’s when I saw you getting your bike off the bike rack on the front of the bus. I thought, “Hey, he has a bike just like mine. Our bikes must look like twins up there.” I got off at the next stop and realized there was no twin bike. The one you left behind was smaller and crappier than my bike. The bus driver told me where you work, asshole. When I find you, you better have my bike!

Matt Bors

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