[Savage Love] 'I Need to Know If I Should Even Bother Anymore'

Too Sad For A Pseudonym

Your points are well-taken, TSFAP, and I hear you. Hell, I agree with you; I frequently tear into faggots who play up their disgust with female genitals in a misguided attempt to justify their gayness. But my comparison of female genitals to canned hams dropped from great heights wasn't grounded in disgust, TSFAP, so much as it was unfamiliarity. And, hey, I deserve some credit for comparing women's genitals to something I will put in my mouth. Ham? Love it! Baked or canned, dropped from a great height or grilled to perfection—can't get enough! It would have been infinitely ruder of me to compare women's genitals to something I would never, ever put in my mouth, something like . . . uh . . . women's genitals.

And, excuse me, but haven't you been paying attention? The entire Republican Party is a mad gay orgy. Brace yourself, TSFAP!

So, Dan, I agree that men in their 30s and 40s who "date" legal teenage boys have a good chance of being scummy. But what about men who make no bones about just wanting some of that sweet twink ass and are honest with their just-out-of-high-school playmates? Is the 40ish man who says, "I am not in love with you. I might think you're cool. I do think you're hot. Let's fuck!" a refreshingly honest learning opportunity for a barely legal boy just out on his own? Or does the inherent power imbalance mean all older guys are self-deluding scumbags?

Thirtysomething Realizes Oldsters Lack Luster

The campsite rule applies here: So long as older persons leave younger persons in better shape than they found them, it's all good. And emphasizing to a young, horny, potentially love-struck teenager that, while there may be a mutual attraction, love isn't in the cards is one way an older person honors the campsite rule. But, as I wrote last week, since almost all older men willing to sleep with teenagers—gay or straight—are total scumbags, the older person should be regarded as scum until proven otherwise.

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