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Letters'What is this nonsense? Geek goes to San Diego+geek buys toys=cover story?'Published on August 16, 2007Letters may be edited for clarity and length. E-mail to letters@ocweekly.com, or mail to Letters to the Editor, c/o OC Weekly, 1666 N. Main St., Ste. 500, Santa Ana, CA 92701. Or fax to (714) 550-5908. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S NOT METALLICA! RETURN TO THE HEART OF DORKNESS Today was the last straw. I picked up a copy of your paper to find what is surely the stupidest cover you've ever printed: Luke Y. Thompson. Who is in charge over there? Why has it suddenly become so difficult for you guys to put out a cool paper? I was willing to shrug it off when you let that idiot take over your website for several days, but now that you've actually given him space in your paper, I had no choice but to write in and voice my outrage. As I am totally confused about how you could go from being the smartest, hippest thing in OC to being represented by a total weirdo obsessed with toys, I have prepared a list of questions concerning your representative Luke Y. Thompson's coverage of this pointless, vacuous, childish, stupid, limp-dicked, masturbatory, retarded, Mickey Mouse event that someone has deemed not only worthy of paying for, but also worthy to have space in a former great newspaper devoted to it. 1. What is this nonsense? Geek goes to San Diego+geek buys toys=cover story? 2. Isn't this sort of material more appropriate for a MySpace page, or a piece of cardboard held by a homeless man on a median? 3. Who is this man-child you have writing for your paper? Are you really paying a grown man to comment on the "sculpt" of a He-Man doll? What the fuck? Who gives a shit? 4. Can the general public consider a man who dies his hair rainbow anything other than gay, a virgin, or a clown? And even a clown just wears a wig! 5. Does this man-child "LYT" expect anyone to care about what he is writing, let alone read it except out of some weird fascination with watching some nerd turn his geek knob up to 11? 6. Have you by extension become geeks yourselves? 7. Where's the Xena news? Why don't you all just throw yourselves into Nerdlinger Canyon and start reporting on Battlestar Galactica reruns, or George Lucas' ass boils? I gotta say, I've been reading the OC Weekly for a long, long time, since the beginning, and this is by far the stupidest thing I've ever read in affiliation with the paper. You guys are supposed to be cool! You're supposed to be the beacon for the hip in this square county. Instead, you've allowed some weirdo to infiltrate your paper and geek out over fucking Indiana Jones action figures! And all on your dime! You should really be embarrassed that the higher-ups over there have allowed this subpar writer to place this shit in your paper. The only way to save yourselves is to start firebombing. Or to send that rainbow-haired weirdo back to Oz, or wherever he comes from. Can him before we can you. What is up with this Comic-Con bullshit? Not only did that event take place weeks ago, but it also didn't even take place in Orange County. Who the fuck cares about Comic-Con? What is going on in your office? How could you allow this to make the cover? I did a Google search of LYT, and I must say this fucking rainbow-haired DORK has no business writing for a paper that is supposed to be cool. Whatever happened to the COOL OC Weekly? The OC Weekly that spoke out about crooked politicians and profiled hip OC venues and bands? It used to be filled with funny articles that stimulated the reader; now, it is just boring. This paper used to be fun to read. But with this shit on the cover, I have to say I am ashamed to be seen in public holding a copy. Let's revisit the past few weeks of the paper, shall we? A story about a Vietnamese man that was too boring to finish (lame cover), a story about a boy who likes boxing (again too boring to finish), a story about four Mexicans who don't live here anymore (BORING, and the cover was awful, too) and a fucking comic-book convention. WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO MY FAVORITE PAPER????
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