Checking Out Your Neighbor's Ass

For about a year or so (we're too drunk to remember), DJ Frankie "The Face" has been spinning some absolutely loverly northern soul and some delicious dancey tracks (all vinyl carefully shopped for and collected by the dear boy, how kind!) for a monthly affair called—wait for it—the Secret Affair. What's better on a Friday night than a secret affair? Nothing! Except maybe the kind of dance party at which if you're not sweating, you're not doing it right, there's baby powder on the floor to facilitate your Mod moves, and you better bet there will be a line for the

bathroom. I was once actually offered the currency of a Budweiser if I just took care of it outside—peeing, that is. I got the Budweiser. But the point I'm making here is that at the Secret Affair, they mean it. Next month, they move to Alex's Bar, where the staff will be able to manage the huge crowd a bit better than the Pike seemed able. So this is your last chance to enjoy the chance to be put in a headlock for no legitimate reason by the Pike's surly bouncer and the obscenely long drink wait when you finally do get in. Do it for old time's sake.

Also starring DJs Jesse Gomez and Brett Phillips, this is one Friday night with massive sex appeal. And isn't that what Fridays are for? 

The Secret Affair at the Pike, 1836 E. Fourth St., Long Beach, (562) 437-4453; www.myspace.com/thepike. Fri., 9 p.m. Call for cover. 21+.