Hey, You!

You are the identity thief/illegal alien who tried to buy my house. After 30 days of escrow you were unable to produce a Social Security card that matched your name. Unfortunately, I had already moved my entire house into storage and relocated my family. Also, all the offers I have put in on other houses are now null and void. It's bad enough that the other illegals in my neighborhood leave trash all over the place. Now I have one who trashed my life. I'll be sure to follow up on that Social Security number you submitted and find out exactly whom it belongs to. Watch out for la migra, fuckhole!

Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations—changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent—to "Hey, You!" c/o OC Weekly, 1666 N. Main St., Ste. 500, Santa Ana, CA 92701-7417, or e-mail us at letters@ocweekly.com.