Boy Crazy

The sad chronicles of a man who wants a boy to love him

[. . .]

Are you allowed to call and write me? I worry because you haven't returned either of my calls this week. If there is a problem, just let me know so I won't wonder and be left in suspense.

[. . .]

If you get this around your b-day, then HAPPY B-DAY!

[. . .]

Also, remember if you are allowed to write and call, then communication is a two-way street. If you want to write or call, then do so. I worry that you won't be allowed to or that you will just forget me after a while, so don't let me worry so much, little guy. Keep in touch [smiley face]

[. . .]

Are you allowed to come out next summer to visit me? If so, then when can you come? Please let me know. I am waiting for you to call me because when we last talked you said you would call in 3-4 days. Also, I called you twice after then and I haven't heard from you yet. So, if you get this letter and you haven't called yet, then you can bet that I am concerned.

Love,

Jeff

9/24, 11:50 p.m. (Pacific)

Hi Billy,

It's late. You're undoubtedly asleep by now. Enclosed are the following to keep you briefed on USC football this fall. (I don't want to say 'USC domination' or anything like that because I may jinx 'SC and make them lose to Notre Lame or UCLA.

[. . .]

Note: I am sending you this before I get your letter. I also have not opened up the package. I will do that on my birthday. I will write you right after receiving your letter, also [smiley face].

[. . .]

I hope that you had a great B-day. I really miss you and not spending it out there with you. I can't wait to see you again! Hopefully, at New Years this year.

[. . .]

Somehow, I always find a way to get myself into the strangest positions. Anyways, I try to forget all of that by looking forward to seeing you again. I am praying for you in school and in everything else. Hang in there. Even though you may not always think so, I am here for you to lean on. 2,600 miles is not going to keep me from being there for you, LITTLE GUY-NEVER!! [smiley face]. So smile. And I know that I've got you to talk to also.

[. . .]

I love you. Have a happy day, night, etc. I can't wait to see you!! I hope soon.

Love,

Jeff

10/1

Billy,

When you write me, why don't you write letters this long? I ask you tons of questions in my letters to you that you don't answer. Anyway, I still haven't received your B-day card, but I got your letter yesterday. How is band? How do you feel about your chances to get onto the basketball team? How do you feel about high school now? How do you feel about me not being around anymore? Are you used to it? I figured that after a while, others would get you to forget about me enough to not miss me anymore.

[. . .]

Work on the campaign has been very time consuming. I have done nothing but campaign stuff every day for two weeks now. In fact, between LSAT classes and work, I haven't gone to church once since I've been out here. Speaking of church, how's my favorite church? Has anyone there come up to you and said anything lately? I'm sure they will, considering that I gave Yates my opinion about what I know they're up to. Don't get yourself caught in the middle of a bunch of hypocrites. They are not Christians.

[. . .]

I hope you are doing well in high school. Don't allow yourself to get caught up in the alcohol, trouble-making, sex etc. That is so common in high schools now. It's just not worth it. It may seem like fun, but you will pay for it later, no matter how harmless it may seem now. I can't be there to watch you, and I will not become angry if I learn you have done something bad, so please be honest with me even though I know you don't want to because you think that telling me what you're up to will make me think less of you. I won't. But you've got to trust me, and don't trust anybody who tries to convince you that 'making out,' having sex, doing drugs, drinking, getting into a car with a drunk driver etc is cool. It's not. It's stupid.

[. . .]

I miss you tons. Please, please, please write me when you get this. Send me a letter in a regular envelope, and try to write a longer letter. Just let your pen flow.

Love,

Jeff

10/9

Billy,

Well, it's 10:20 a.m. and I'm here at the Scott Baugh for Assembly campaign headquarters. I just spoke with you a little while ago. I hope that you understand that I wouldn't get angry at you for going to the mall or Reston Town Center. If you were to do something wrong there, I wouldn't be happy, but neither would your parents. Billy, I'm telling you, don't do anything now that you're going to regret later. If you think it's time of us to stop communicating, then the ball is in your court. I know you would say that you want to stay in touch, but I can't keep in touch if you don't want to be honest with me. If you have a reason for not being honest with me, then let's talk about it. You deserve to have your own life and to make whatever choices you wish. You know that I care about you very much. Just look around your room at everything I have bought for you. Think about all that I've done for you. Billy, I don't want to run your life like others who will remain nameless. I just want to have an honest relationship with you. If you feel that is not possible, the decision is yours to make.

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