Commie Girl

Freedom Costs a Buck-O-Five: Ladies and gentlemen, your Labor Day weekend!

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Later that day, it still being Labor Day weekend and all, I hit Mikey and Cher's for a Pirate Party, they having upgraded Talk Like a Pirate Day (Sept. 19) to Talk Like a Pirate Month (September). It was fun. We drank pirate juice. There were Jell-O shots. There were sea chanteys (mostly consisting of anything Irish; lots of Flogging Molly and the Pogues). There was a pool, but I left before dusk, when the Dive-In MoviePirates of Penzance—was to start. I had immoral, decadent gays to see.

I was about as fun as a wet sock by the time we hit the Boom Boom Room(not closing for another year), a dozen of our finer gays in tow. My feet hurt, and I'd been drinking pirate juice in the sunshine, and the music was as terrible as it can only be at a gay bar (even worse than the music I'd bitched about at the Shark Club a few weeks back; that at least had had words instead of just the unholy beeps of trucks backing up), and I hadn't had very much sleep because I'd sort of been having an immoral time of my own with my friend who didn't take me to Del Mar because I had to go to Van Tran's goddamn pancake breakfast. Still, I would have sooner died than whine to my friends about whether they were ready to leave when in fact they were having a perfectly lovely time eyeing the half-naked men and the bad-ass Lady Victoria (above). So we stayed, and stayed, and stayed some more. Here's a picture. Isn't that terrific?

Bad-ass. Photo by Madame Montana
Bad-ass. Photo by Madame Montana

My gays, being gentlemen, picked up the check.

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Melting Point Wrap-Up
This week's topic? Our '08 predictions. KJ in Austin called Al Gore my babydaddy, which is just about exactly right. Erik Brown, on the Right, said he'd be happy with your more conservative fellows, like Sam Brownback or George Allen, but hadn't heard about the whole "macaca" thing. He was saddened, being against calling people of color "monkeys" and all. Shawn Fago talked for a very long time about Jim Gilmore(who?) and Rudy Giuliani. And Chuck called in to say there's nothing wrong with calling people of color "monkeys" or with any of Allen's picadilloes, like loving the Confederate flag, or hanging a noose in your office, or voting against the MLK holiday (which, I never tire of reminding people, Dick Cheney did too). Then (he was very angry) he said he taught in "Los Aliengeles" and called me an "airhead" and a "chick" in a very spitty kind of way. Okay, Sinatra. That's why the lady is a tramp.

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