Diary of a Mad County

Aug. 23: For losers

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Tuesday, Aug. 29
Perhaps after he finishes The Stranger, George W. Bush could add the Florida Baptist Witness to his reading list. The Witness quotes Bush gal pal Katherine Harris as saying, "If you're not electing Christians, then in essence you are going to legislate sin." Harris was apparently fully clothed when making the comments—thank you, Jesus! She is presently running for the U.S. Senate in Florida and doing such a bang-up job that the state GOP has asked her to get out of the race. Harris goes on to say that separation of church and state is "a lie we have been told" and that "God is the one who chooses our rulers." Now, if Harris, who looks increasingly like Leona Helmsley, knows anything, she knows lies. You know, like the one she hears every morning from her staff when they say, "No, you don't look completely out of your mind." Now, this is all fun, but consider this: If Harris really does believe this stuff—if she really does believe God wants born-again Christians as our "rulers"—then certifying an election you know to be rigged isn't lying, is it? It's following a higher truth. Well, as Camus observes in the last line of The Stranger, "Thank God everything worked out for the best." I think we can all agree on that.

SLOWERY@OCWEEKLY.COM