By On the occasion of our 20th anniversary
By Gustavo Arellano
By R. Scott Moxley
By Alfonso Delgado
By Courtney Hamilton
By Joel Beers
By Peter Maguire
By Charles Lam
* * *
So we were having a wonderful time, my Theo and I, when he pointed out that the silver-fox bassist, who was smiling and smiling from the stage, and at whom I was smiling and smiling right back, used to be in Tex and the Horseheads, and I gasped, "But I've said terrible things about Tex and the Horseheads!" Because not only have I called Texacala Jones a tiny, shriveled senior citizen lady, but I also said I left their show early because they were boring, and that I'd been assured they were boring 20 years ago too.
Well, luckily my new boyfriend didn't know that.
He came up to us after the show, of course (how could he not?), and I introduced myself. "I know exactly who you are," he said. "We've probably been in the same room about 15 times."
Oh, that makes sense. Then I told him Theo informed me he'd been in Tex and the Horseheads, about whom I'd written just some terrible things.
"I know exactly what you wrote," he told me. But nicely! Oh, he can't stay mad at me!
Was he married?
Did he have a girlfriend?
"Well . . . uh . . ."
That's usually a yes.
And then Theo got to laugh at me for a while. Wank.
Tune your radio now: beginning Sunday, July 16, CG co-hosts Melting Point, left-to-right political talk Sundays at 11 p.m. on KRLA-AM 870. CommieGirlCollective.com.