Diary of a Mad County

"Hey, Dad, do some people work in stores just so they can get the employee discount?"

"Yeah, I think some people do that."

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"I think that's a good idea."

"Yeah, I guess. Except if you're going to do that, you better make sure you really like what the store sells and are going to want it over and over. I mean, it's stupid to do that in a store where you only want one thing."

"If I was going to do that, you know where I'd work?"

"Where?"

"Williams-Sonoma."

"Williams-Sonoma? Why?"

"Because they've got great dinnerware."

"[. . .]"

"They do. A spoon there costs like 25 bucks."

"[. . .]"

"You gotta have spoons."

"Yeah, you gotta have spoons. Are you serious? Williams-Sonoma?"

"[Excited.] Yes. [Voice lowered.] What? . . . [Flatly, registering dread.] You're going to write about this in 'Diary,' aren't you?"

slowery@ocweekly.com