By On the occasion of our 20th anniversary
By Gustavo Arellano
By R. Scott Moxley
By Alfonso Delgado
By Courtney Hamilton
By Joel Beers
By Peter Maguire
By Charles Lam
Sunday, April 24: I'll do better next week.
Monday, April 25: Now, I'm on record as saying that I think the Angelsshould not only be allowed but encouraged to change their designation to Los Angeles. Besides meaning possible new money streams to spend on free agents, I didn't buy the argument that somehow people would get the Angels confused with the Dodgers.Well, today I opened up the LATimessportssectionand noticed in the two columns given for American League hitting leaders, this under home runs: Guerrero,Dodgers...5. That would be Vladimir Guererro, the Angelsright fielder and reigning American League MVP. Vlad was also listed as a Dodger in three other categories, as was Darin Erstad, who is second in the league in doubles.
Tuesday, April 26: To the runner with the very shapely legs I saw in Long Beach on Atherton on my way to the doctor, I would just like to apologize about the many impure thoughts I had about you. From my angle, coming from behind you—oooooh, yeeees—Icould not see that you are actually ayoungmanwho either shaves his legs, his very lovely legs—you obviously work out a lot—or is one of those nationalities where the men don't have any hair but make up for it in sexy. Again, I am sorry that I longed and/or pined for you in any way. I am also sorry if my slowing down my car, staring at you, doing a double take, followed by a Danny Thomasesque spit take, followed by what seemed to be me fumbling with something in my lap—which I wasn't—in any way freaked you out, scared you or made you think I was stuck up. Again, I apologize. Call me.