By On the occasion of our 20th anniversary
By Gustavo Arellano
By R. Scott Moxley
By Alfonso Delgado
By Courtney Hamilton
By Joel Beers
By Peter Maguire
By Charles Lam
Thurs/March 31: Get smoooove with ChestRockwelland NathanielMerriweatherof Handsome Boy Modeling School. According to Michael Coyle'sCalendar contents page last week, from which I stole this item, Chest and Nathaniel are producers DantheAutomatorand Prince Paul, who've worked "incomparably" with DeLaSouland KoolKeith.With 4th Avenue Jones. 8 p.m. $18-$20. All ages. House of Blues, 1530 S. Disneyland Dr., Anaheim, (714) 778-2583.
Fri: Now, I almost never actually go to any of the events I recommend to you since I like to stay home and watch my ass grow. But Vampires, Werewolves and Witches Social Hour? For-real vampires, werewolves and witches? You couldn't keep me away with Jesushimself on the cross. 7 p.m. Free. The Auld Dubliner Pub, 71 S. Pine Ave., Long Beach, (562) 437-8300; www.vampires.meetup.com/9/.
Sat: Also? I willbe at the Orange County Music Awards because I'm the host! So if you don't want to see me there, kindly do not show up. Doors open 7 p.m. $22.50. TheGroveofAnaheim,2200E.KatellaAve.,Anaheim,(714)712-2200.
Sun: I haven't been able to write a review of "Laguna'sHiddenTreasures—ArtfromPrivateCollections"at LagunaArtMuseumbecause the show is really good, and you know how hard that is for me. Go on down and check out more than 70 works by Peter Alexander, Wayne Thiebaud, Cindy Sherman, Andy Warhol, Annie Leibovitz, Ed Kienholzand a ton of others. 11 a.m.-5 p.m. Free. Laguna Art Museum, 307 Cliff Dr., Laguna Beach, (949) 494-8971.
Mon: Judy Chamberlainis a really, really, really good torch singer. I don't know about this "Partner's Bistro," but it's a Monday night, so quit yer bitching. 7 p.m. Partner'sBistro,448S.CoastHwy.,LagunaBeach,(949)497-4441.
Tues: Hey, ladies! You know where a great place to meet men is? Lectures! It's totally true! (One of these weeks, I'm gonna do an all-lectures Eight Days, I swear to Christ. Be ready!) Perhaps there will even be men at Humor in American Literature, looking at classic humorists including James Thurber, Mark Twain, Ogden Nashand others. But no Three Stooges? Hmmm. This might not be prime poaching after all. 7:30 p.m. $5. Lido Isle Clubhouse, 701 Via Lido Sound, Lido Isle, Newport Beach, (714) 432-5087.
Wed: According to the Country listings, from which I stole this item, "'MyOld Friend Whiskey'and 'Complete'are just two of the terrific original tunes you're likely to hear from Brian Lynn Jones & the Misfit Cowboys." I know nothing about these boys, but I like country, and I like cowboys even better, and that's why you're being directed to this show. Also, it's a Wednesday. You are so lucky. 8:30 p.m. 18-20, $10; 21+, $5. Crazy Horse Steakhouse, Irvine Spectrum, 71 Fortune Dr., Ste. 864, Irvine, (949) 585-9000; www.crazyhorse2000.com.
Thurs/April 7: I don't know about seeing Jimmy Buffetinside. I think it's supposed to be more of a festival kind of feeling, with lots and lots of really good pot. I would like to go to a Jimmy Buffet concert someday. Those folks may be square, but they sure do like to have fun. 8 p.m. $36-$86. All ages. Arrowhead Pond of Anaheim, 2695 E. Katella Ave., Anaheim, (714) 704-2400; www.arrowheadpond.com.