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Medium-CoolSurprising revelation in Leonard adaptation: The RockMichael AtkinsonPublished on March 03, 2005AtleasttheMGMmarketerswaitedforDutch Leonard to write a GetShortysequel before they green-lit a filmed one—but the wait may have cost them. BeCool,being the further LA adventures in shylockiana of Chili Palmer, has a distinctively dated ambience; the first five minutes are distinguished by a slab of '80s-TV-show soundtrack, a visit to the Viper Room, a Carrot Top joke, and a flailing cameo by James Woods as a record producer who promptly, mercifully, gets popped by Russian gangsters. The smell of calamity is in the air. As we know from the bruises left by the worst dozen movies derived from this ever seductive master's books, a Leonard filmization depends wholly on the light dance step of the filmmaker in question. Surprisingly, GetShorty'sBarry Sonnenfeld demonstrated a soft shoe, but BeCool'sF. Gary Gray seems a clueless bystander, watching the new machine attempt to clone the earlier model's rhythms, gestures, and confidence, but never knowing which switches to flip. But while BeCoolis decidedly uncool, Elmore's DNA still runs through it. Palmer (John Travolta again) decides, once Woods' slimeball is dead, that the music industry is something he'd like to try. He mixes up with the leggy widow (Uma Thurman), an idiot wigger producer (Vince Vaughn), his gay and relatively harmless bodyguard (The Rock), a zillionaire rap producer with a hard-charging posse of handgun-flourishing thugs (Cedric the Entertainer), and eventually, Steven Tyler as the lead singer of a deathless rock band named Aerosmith. The story is pretzely in a way Leonard probably enjoys working out as he naps; suffice it to say that it's run amok with double betrayals and tropes lifted straight from Get Shorty. Unfortunately, it's all centered on a dull BeyoncĂ©-wannabe up-and-comer (Christina Milian, whose albums are corporate-owned by Universal, oddly). Her mush-sob story about wanting to make it big lands in your hair early; throughout, Palmer and the other industry toughies gaze upon this warbling honey doll as if she were made of stardust. When she's placed in concert with Aerosmith, co-crooning "Cryin'," this semi-sardonic view of a mercenary industry becomes itself a bit of a pandering hustle.
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