Season 2, Episode 6

The boys and their just-put together band To End All Seasons play a battle of the bands contest at a fine Westminster establishment called "Castles" followed by four words in Vietnamese that may or may not translate into "Castles." Among those impressed by the guys' brand of hardcore is a neo-punk teen blonde who calls herself "Mrs. Seth Cohen," although she's previously gone by "Mrs. Lance Bass," "Mrs. Oliver James" and "Mrs. The Guy From Dashboard Confessional." For once, between the hours of 8 and 9 p.m. on a Thursday, real life Orange County is nailed: Vietnamese bar keeps serving half-off beer, white and Latino kids banging heads in black-metal unity and parental units who'd all once wondered if it was really such a good idea to max their credit cards on drums, amps, guitars, lessons and those little chrome thingies that have something to do with keeping the cymbals on the stand—those DAMN little chrome thingies that always seem to go missing come show time—huddling in the club's darkened crevices.

Merry Chrismukkah one and all!

Okay, didn't see The O.C. last night. Went to my son's show. (He's the drummer whose double-bass pedal broke as they were setting up. Guess what he's getting for Chrismukkah?) Fortunately, Weekly Calendar Editor Ellen Griley—who's even more geeked by The O.C. than me, if you can believe that--saw it and claims it was the best EVER! She even admitted it left her in tears, tears that were still falling as she blurted out something about Lindsay making cute little Chrismukkah Santa yarmulkes, Caleb admitting to his family his old affair with Lindsay's mom (the affair that produced Lindsay), Julie calling Caleb a slut for cheating on his ex-wife, then getting it on with her ex-husband Jimmy in the bathroom, Ryan consoling a sobbing Kirsten and everyone gathering in the end at Lindsay's for a traditional family holiday gathering.

You decide which Orange County is realer.

LINE OF THE WEEK: The one I did in the Castles bathroom, before being named Father of the Year for taking my daughter (Mrs. Seth Cohen) to see her brother play with a band that makes my eardrums bleed.