Diary of a Mad County

MONDAY, Nov. 15 Horrible.

TUESDAY, Nov. 16 John Selian, an 86-year-old retired businessman from Garden Grove, goes on trial in U.S. District Court today for allegedly planning a trip to the Philippines for the purpose of having sex with two preteen girls. This business of traveling around the world having sex with young girls is known as sex tourism, though you may be familiar with it by its old name: Rolling Stones World Tour. Selian was charged under a new law that makes it a crime for a U.S. citizen to travel to another country for illicit sex, and this is nothing to joke about except dude was arrested with 100 pounds of chocolate, which, I guess, he was either going to use to entice the girls—ages nine and 12—or threaten them with diabetes.