Episode 26

The boys from THE O.C. go to THE Vegas because you can't be a right proper Nouveau Riche manchild unless, like Seth and Sandy Cohen, you love THE Vegas (almost as much as you love placing the article THE before geographic destinations, the overuse of which during this episode had me nearly going to THE crapper to expel THE vomit). The occasion for this round of Sin City slumming is Caleb Nichol's bachelor party, which Seth, Sandy, Jimmy and Ryan crash, much to the chagrin of the forever-scheming mega-developer (oxymoron?), who actually wasn't breaking away to get a lap dance but to secretly unload his just-acquired Lighthouse--excuse me, THE Lighthouse--for 10 times more than he paid Sandy and Jimmy for Old Newport's decrepit watering hole. The episode then spins like an Aerosmith roulette wheel into an hour-long infomercial for the Hard Rock Hotel (or, in the words of Sandy quoting Seth: "ground zero for aging hipsters"). Unfortunately, Caleb's bowling alley-equipped penthouse suite, scummy downtown poker parlors and Vegas' collegiate working girls (or, the words of Summer quoting herself: "whores and skanks") manage to part Seth from $1,000 worth of bar mitzvah bonds--until Ryan saves the day with a miraculous Texas Hold 'Em win streak that reimburses Seth, funds Theresa's impending escape to Atlanta and gets Ryan the big loser's trucker hat. That's Trucker Hat: the official headgear of the 909. The Vegascapades also allow Julie to have her very own bachelorette party at the Cohen manse, for which she demands a real male stripper, not one of those Chippendale queens. As usual, what Caleb and Julie want, Caleb and Julie get. However, the shenanigans on The Strip end with Jimmy punching Caleb in the kisser, while the shenanigans with The Strippers end with Julie and Hailey recreating the famous pool fight between Krystle and Alexis on Dynasty (ABC's Dynasty was your parents' The O.C., kiddies.) The biggest blow of the night is delivered to Marissa by Theresa, who lets it slip that not only is she pregnant (THE preggers), but her fiancé Eddie may not be the sperm donor. Looks like Chino's got some 'splaining to do…

LINE OF THE WEEK: "The man who took Julie off my hands? I'll buy him a lap dance. Hell, I'll give him one myself." Jimmy, explaining why he'll gladly crash Caleb's bachelor party.