Episode 12

It's bizarre alliance night as, by the time the end credits roll, Sandy's chummy with Jimmy, Kirsten's buddy-buddy with Julie and, most incredibly, Ryan's all palsie wowsie with Luke. The last two mortal enemies, who've both had carnal relations with Marissa, are partnered in a history-class project. That inevitably leads them to a car dealership owned by Luke's father, who the boys unwittingly catch in the gayest gay kiss in prime time since Uncle Bill slipped Mr. French the tongue in that lost Family Affairepisode. We also discover the name of the fictional high school that's the cross-town rival of The O.C. teens' fictional Harbor Academy (the institution that would result if real-life Newport Harbor High mated with Newport Coast's exclusive Sage Hill School, apparently). The O.C.'s unreal rival is Del Vista (think Corona delMar High), something we learn because it's emblazoned on the back of the jackets worn by thugs who beat the crap out of Luke because his daddy's queer.

LINE OF THE WEEK: "Yes, I'd like something for the road. It's called gossip. Was there any cross burning? Any goose-stepping? Small Taiwanese family locked in the basement? What?" Seth, seeking dirt about Luke's household after Ryan visited there.