Obi-Won Kenobi

Illustration by Bob AulWe came into your Fullerton bookstore and you shadowed us, perhaps thinking we'd steal books because we have tattoos. You questioned us on our true interest in books, implying that we might not be able to read. Then you attempted to use the Force to deter us from your back room of collectible books as if we were illiterates. There is nothing there for you, you said in a kind of Obi-Won Kenobi monotone. You don't want to go there.When that didn't work, you simply insisted that we leave because your husband wasn't around to answer questions. We are polite, well groomed and friendly. You are a sad, judgmental troll. In all my years of living in Fullerton, I have never been kicked out of a shop or even a bar. I'm getting an English degree at Cal State Fullerton. I read a lot, and I'm guessing you don't, or else you'd already be familiar with such great scenes from literature as King Henry V's disguised walk around his camp the night before the Battle of Agincourt. Not everything is as it appears, Ancient One.

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