Illustration by Bob AulBeautiful summer day and you pass me on the right. Your huge, tattered American flag flaps in the wind from the back of your jeep. At the stop, I look at your flag decals, and read your bumper stickers until I am stopped by the "Libertarians for Bush" sticker. Now I've never known a libertarian who could explain what it is in less than six paragraphs, but I think I know this much: Those who are REAL libertarians have MAJOR issues with George Bush. My guess is that saying you are a libertarian is a lot cooler than saying you're a right-wing, rabid conservative. But I know real well—from your multiple American flags and from your actions toward me (to be revealed momentarily)—that you don't understand this libertarian thing at all. What part of that "Live and Let Live" stuff don't you get?
So, the light changes, and you fall behind me only to come racing up to me and, with great ceremony, flip me off and spin your wheels for emphasis. Apparently you are as perplexed by my bumper sticker as I am by yours. It reads: "End the Cycle of Violence. War will not bring peace and security." What's so funny about peace, love and understanding anyway?
Send anonymous thanks, confessions or accusations —changing or deleting the names of the guilty and innocent—to "Hey, You!" c/oOC Weekly, P.O. Box 10788, Costa Mesa, CA 92627-0247, or e-mail us at email@example.com