Diary of a Mad County

FRIDAY, April 25: The Dixie Chicks, victims of a far-reaching conspiracy to keep them out of the public eye, are the discussion point of tonight's Crossfire program on CNN. The debate is joined by actor Mike Farrelland former Congressman Bob Dornan but completely misses the point, which is that Bob Dornan's jowls have eaten his neck. Jeez, does this guy have a fat face. And red. Remember thinking what an assface Dornan is. Well . . . The Newport-to-Ensenada yacht race commences. Gentlemen, start your livers.

SATURDAY-SUNDAY, April 26-27: The new Vietnam War Memorial is dedicated Sunday in Little Saigon a few days before the anniversary of the Fall of Saigon. Whether the timing was an issue is not clear; neither is whether it's wise to be making a big fuss about erecting a memorial to the losing side, including flying the flag of the defeated South Vietnamese republic/puppet regime. Word is the memorial was designed by a firm specializing in immortalizing second-place finishers. Their previous designs have included work for Susan Lucci, the Buffalo Bills and George W. Bush.