One thing you can say about those crazed Weezer fans: insanity breeds creativity, though not necessarily intelligence. Proof of this arrived last week amid various media reports of the city of Irvine's crackdown on not-exactly handicapped people who rudely park in handicapped spots. One such destined-to-burn-in-hell-for-all-eternity cretin was the teen girl who got caught using her dead grandma's blue placard at Weezer's Aug. 9 Verizon Wireless Amphitheater show. Once fingered, the sorry lass tried to convince the cops that she was, in fact, the rightful 80-year-old owner of the placard—1920s birth date and all! Apparently her copy of Maladroit came with some pretty strong X tabs. (Rich Kane)
LISTOMANIA! Wedding gifts for Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale, compliments of the LowBallAssChatter staff:
1. Divorce for Dummies book.
2. The complete Bi and Beyond video series (Gavin, in his pre-Bush, pre-Gwen days, was fingered by Boy George in his autobiography as having a thing for trannies).
3. For Gwen: Rogaine. For Gavin: breast implants.
4. For Gavin: a bill for the $15 we spent on the last Bush album, Golden State, which we keep finding in the dollar bin at our local used CD shop.
5. Hardcore makeup remover.
6. Sid and Nancyon DVD—or Kurt and Courtney if it ever gets released. RAVING LUNATICS! Orange County nightclub promoters may cry about the historic practice of undercover cops sniffing around their raves for ecstasy and a cornucopia of real-and-imagined other drugs, but they've never had to deal with this Bush-wacker of a clampdown. Buzz, an internationally famous Washington, D.C., club, was forced to close down last week, and its promoters claim the U.S. military, the feds and the D.C. police colluded to knock them out of business. The shuttering was the brutal end of a more-than-two-year military-police investigation into Buzz. According to Buzz promoters, military brass have overreacted to the rave-induced hooliganism of a few off-duty soldiers in the past, and they recently banned all military personnel from visiting the club. But the club's troubles weren't over. D.C. Police and city authorities threatened to revoke the liquor license of the venue that hosted Buzz if the club wasn't given the kibosh. So Buzz was killed, and D.C. lost some of its most vital nightlife. The story is just the latest incident of a federal government push to kill rave nightclubbing. The Senate is considering what is too-cutely dubbed the R.A.V.E. (Reducing Americans' Vulnerability to Ecstacy) Act, which expands the federal "crack house statute" to make it easier to fine or imprison rave promoters up to 20 years in the federal pokey if they fail to prevent customers or tenants from selling or using drugs on their premises or at their events. The law could drive the scene out of existence because the definition of "drugs" might be something as pedestrian as glow sticks and water bottles. There's a local bright spot, however. Brian Alper, a promoter with Huntington Beach's B3Cande, a group that has had a couple of mega raves killed by the LA and Riverside County sheriffs, says OC clubbers shouldn't worry—yet. "Orange County may get overlooked," he says. "Buzz was a hugely popular club that brought in world-class DJ talent. Orange County's most high-profile clubs, Rubber and Raw, aren't at the same level. They'll get overlooked. If anyone gets messed with, it's going to be some of the bigger clubs in LA. But you never know." (Andrew Asch)