By On the occasion of our 20th anniversary
By Gustavo Arellano
By R. Scott Moxley
By Alfonso Delgado
By Courtney Hamilton
By Joel Beers
By Peter Maguire
By Charles Lam
MONDAY, May 20 On the night veteran TV newsman Jerry Dunphy's family announces his death, KCAL/Channel 9, the eightysomething's final spot on the dial, presents the following stories in quick-cut succession:
•Students posed nude in a high school photo class.
•Images of kids as young as eight posing seductively in skimpy clothing are the hot new thing on the Internet.
•Penthouse magazine court decision.
•Update on the stripper mom's dispute with a Christian grade school.
•Playboy playmate talks about life as a Playboy playmate.
Wethinks the Dunphster picked the right time to check out. No word on whether his ashes were spread from the desert to the sea to all of Southern California. But just in case this is the start of one of those "they always go in threes" situations, may we nominate Paul Moyer and Ann Martin for the next spots?TUESDAY, May 21 The Orange County Register certainly knows how to send off a local broadcasting legend. Read their headline. Then read their caption:
What's worse than a bacteria-infested beach? How about a 10-naked-guys-infested beach? Teenage girls partying in a mobile home on El Morro Beach near Laguna Beach are startled around 2 a.m. when Chinese guys dressed only in their birthday suits come ashore. Before things can devolve into a KCAL-9 top story, the chaps pull clothing out of plastic bags, get dressed and walk away. The undocumented immigrants are all later picked up by cops, who believe a fishing trawler dropped them off the California coast with flotation devices.FRIDAY, May 24 The FBIadds scuba divers to its growing list of ways in which terrorists may next threaten us. Those Chinese guys are lucky they washed ashore before that bulletin was issued. SATURDAY, May 25 Cigarette makers spent a whopping $9.57 billion to promote their brands in 2000, something anti-tobacco campaignersallege helped stem what had been a steady decline in consumption, the Los Angeles Times reports. But just as there's big money in puffing up puffing, huge amounts of private, taxpayer and tobacco-company settlement funds are being used in anti-smoking campaigns. The Garden Grove-based Gay and Lesbian Community Services Center of Orange Countyannounced it's getting a healthy cut of foundation grants for its multimillion-dollar effort to cut cigarette use among OC gays. Part of that will go to an advertising agency. Is that a vicious circle we smell, or is it the smoke from the Viceroyour life partner just blew in our face?