Crotch Shot

Nashville Pussy goes all the way

I like jazz as much as the next young and fresh and vibrant young thing, which is to say, not really all that much. I'm much more of a Hessian, you know. But, you know, it's nice for brunch. That said, Linda Jemison's new hip-pocket protégé, Chris Williams, has a very nice voice. Heck, the boy can even scat sing! But when the 23-year-old dear started emoting all over a medley of Joe Williams and Miles Davis, about his baby packing her bags and leaving, at Steamer's Jazz Café April 23, well, I wanted to tell him just two things. Chris, baby, I want you to: A) take up drinking and possibly smack. And B) get your heart stomped two to eight times by a real she-devil (preferably the same one over and over). Then you can come on back and show us what you got.

Finally, my deep apologies go to the happy winner from the Yorba Linda Star. When you stepped up to the podium to accept your trophy at the Orange County Press Club awards Saturday night, I was not laughing at you. Sure, it sounded like I was. But it was jealousy and dismay at the fact that this year, I was skunked, there being no category for articles about crotches. That's all. I am so very, very sorry for my graceless and ill-mannered giggling and the one outright guffaw. You deserved better. Thank you!

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