These Lips Arent Sealed

Voice-over pro Beverly Bremers

Beverly Bremers' voice can make you hot. It can also make you bust a gut. It can make the hair prickle on the back of your neck, and it can coax you into blowing some fucker away with your laser rifle. Beverly is a voice-over actress whose characters include the narrator of that creepy Crossing Over With John Edward show, Slug Boy's mom on the much-beloved Cow and Chicken cartoon, and female warrior du jour on various PlayStation gorefests.

She started out as Sheila in Hair on Broadway in 1969 and worked her way over to Hollywood in The Rocky Horror Show as Janet in '74. Between stints, she wrote a charting single, "Don't Say You Don't Remember," and in 1981, she co-wrote the platinum-selling "Mousercise" song. She has even written a couple of plays with Love Boat cult icon Ted Lange, and she has her own eBay page. Bev, quite simply, kicks ass.

After a welcoming 20-minute pep talk about how I can market myself better, electrical consciousness, and eating meat and wearing leather, Bev meandered to food.

Beverly Bremers: I tried being a vegetarian and get healthier. I love animals. I've seen how they're raised as food and butchered. But I did it all at once—just jumped in, quit eating meat altogether. I didn't hold out too long, about a year. I went back when I didn't lose weight and had an undetectable heart rate. OC Weekly: You just need to start smoking. [Laughs.] People say food is a crutch. I say, no, it just tastes good! What about when you were on Broadway? Were you all acid-dropping, hash-smoking Twiggys? Hair was so strenuous—like doing two and a half hours of aerobics. We'd always go to the Haymarket for shepherd's pie before the show because within the first 15 minutes, we'd work it off. In those days, no one was buff either, with muscular midriffs. But if you live in New York City, you're going to be thin. For the short blocks, it's stupid to take a bus. You walk. If it's cold, you walk fast. That's why I hated living there—the long blocks. What about here and now in OC—where do you like to eat?

We like Villa Roma in Lake Forest—it's great. Everybody's really Italian. There's one guy who is so cute my daughter and I always hope he's in because we like to listen to him talk. I've used them to cater parties.

You mean you throw a party and pick up their food and pretend you cooked it yourself?

One time I tried! I couldn't hide all the containers! We also like the pizza at Antonucci's in Mission Viejo. It's a cute mom-and-pop place. We're not into fast food, but we do a lot of takeout. We just got a big-screen TV and a DVD player, so Saturday night is usually movies and takeout because I teach all day and am too lazy to cook.

So you have a theatrical experience at home. Do you throw your popcorn cups on the ground, too?

No, because I'm also the maid! If we want to get fancy, we go to La Ferme—it's French.

What's your favorite dish?

Chocolate mousse.

That's not an entrée.

Oh, it can be!

Villa Roma Ristorante, 23700 El Toro Rd., Ste. D, Lake Forest, (949) 454-8585; Antonucci's, 24190 Alicia Pkwy., Mission Viejo, (949) 472-4332; La Ferme, 28451 Marguerite Pkwy., Mission Viejo, (949) 364-6664.
 
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