We Love a Parade

Fabulous Event No. 3: Johnny Jones and the Suffering Halos with Peepshot at the Blue Cafe. We were really enjoying Peepshot, bouncing about all happy-like, until we mentioned to our homegirl Arrissia how Mellencampy they were. "I was thinking they were a little more Hootie," said she, completely ruining our fun. "But you can like them!" We hate that girl.

Only Johnny Jones and the Suffering Halos could ease our pained heart. And they did.

Fabulous Event No. 4: The Laguna Beach Art Walk. No, really! There was all manner of delicious smack being talked on March 2 as a cute local boy pointed out various people who had said pretentious things—and they weren't even us! Then we went back to Jorg Dubin's canyon studio and proceeded to slosh a very fine bottle of red wine onto everything. Sorry, Jorg. If our homegirl Arrissia had been there, we would have sloshed it on her head. You probably like Arrissia, don't you? Don't you? Because Arrissia isn't gay—or is she?She slugs like a boy. We're just saying. God, you and your intolerance really blow.