Guilty Pleasures


601 Conversations by OC favorite son Richard Nixon that have come to light recently, such as this phone exchange between the then-president and Attorney General John Mitchell regarding an LA Times report on an immigration raid that nabbed 36 illegal immigrants at a food-processing plant owned by Romana Banuelos, the woman Trickie Dickie had just named U.S. treasurer:

602 Nixon: "The fellow out there in the immigration service is a kike by the name of [George] Rosenberg. He is out. He is to be out. Transfer him to some other place out of Los Angeles. I don't give a goddamn what the story is! He went on television. You put him out for going on television, which is a violation."

603 We don't know what the violation was; Nixon and Mitchell-still dead-were unavailable for comment.

604 The German pancake with lemon, powdered sugar and applesauce at Gustav's Jägerhaus. 2525 E. Ball Rd., Anaheim, (714) 520-9500.

605 Reading the menu at Gustav's Jägerhaus, which includes rabbit, wild boar, elk and deer.

606 The sauerbratenat Gustav's Jägerhaus.

607 When you eat at Gustav's Jägerhaus, your busboy is Asian, one waiter is Latino, and another is Anglo.

608 Gustav is wearing a Hawaiian-print shirt.

609 Is California greator what?

610 No Hurricane Floyd.

611 Very little Pink Floyd.

612 We still like Floyd, the May-

berry barber.

613 "We've a government that controls us from birth until death. Government is very afraid we will someday take our country back. That's why they want to take away our guns." Letter to the Register, Sept. 29, 1999.

614 House of Bibles, where you learn it all-chapter and verse. 123 E. Commonwealth, Fullerton, (714) 992-5051.

615 More cool houses.

617 House of Beepers, not to be confused with House of Bleepers. 1212 S. Bristol St., Santa Ana, (714) 992-5081.

618 House of Cards. Watch it fall like a . . . 3152 E. La Palma Ave., Anaheim, (714) 630-0838.

619 House of Cutleryfor a realsharper image. 8604 On the Mall, Buena Park, (714) 826-7880.

620 House of Flys, which is-surprisingly -somewhere other than my house. 1759 Newport Blvd., Costa Mesa, (949) 646-5919.

621 House of Brews, which is where we're going after we put out this sucker. 16903 Algonquin, Huntington Beach, (714) 377-3893.

622 And our favorite house . . .

623 Dr. Ronald Housepian, the best dentist on the planet, by gum. 2000 Newport Blvd., Costa Mesa, (949) 642-7495.

624 Bolsa Chica Mesa, where great blue herons may be seen having wild sex in the trees before shortsighted developers pave it.

625 "Orange County gangs have killed many more women and children [than mountain lions]. Shouldn't we consider the hunting of gang members?" Letter to the Register, April 10, 1995.

626 Huntington Beach's Omar Hassan has elbow pins, ankle screws and surgery on parts of his knee that sound like a Latin Mass: a dislocation and a tear to his anterior crucia ligament and meniscus. And he's only 25. What kind of future could this guy have? Well, he has already traveled the world and owned his own skateboard company, Formula One. He was also smart enough to get out and skate for someone else, and he wasn't too proud to beg to get on the label he had always wanted to skate for, John Lucero's OC-based Black Label. After sitting on the sidelines for eight months and facing the prospect of never skating again, he tackled physical therapy, trained hard and, three years later, is back on top. He just took first at the pro bowl and 10th in the vert finals, wowing the crowd with channel boardslides at this year's Vans Triple Crown World Championships of Skateboarding. He surfs; snowboards; and skates street, vert, mini ramps, pools and anything else he can find. His body may have been thrashed, but it's dead sexy.

627 Whose ideawas this?

628 Is everybody feeling all right?!

629 Well, all right!

630 The Latin jazz at Steamers Café. 138 W. Commonwealth Ave., Fullerton, (714) 871-8800.

631 The jazz wall of fame at Steamers Café, especially the photos of Chet Baker taken by Bill Claxton.

632 Costa Mesa Super Burgers, the best place to eat gyroswhile your girlfriend shops for a new outfit at the Lab. 2966 Bristol, Costa Mesa, (714) 662-2572.

633 We've never been to a Havana, Cuba, cigar shop, but we've been close: the humidor at Hi-Times Cellars. 250 Ogle St., Costa Mesa, (949) 650-8463.

634 Metropolisdance club . . . oh, yeah: that's gone, too.

635 You're soakingin it.

636 More Nixonchat:

637 Nixon: "With all your other problems, there's one thing that I want done, and I don't want any argument about it. I want you to direct the most trusted person you have in the immigration service that they look over all the activities of the Los Angeles Times-all, underlined. And they are to send their teams in to see whether they are violating the wetback thing. Now let me explain 'cause as a Californian, I know. Everybody in California hires them. There's no law against it because they are there, because-for menial things and so forth. [Then-Times publisher] Otis Chandler: I want him checked with regard to his gardener. I understand he's a wetback. Is that clear?"

638 Mitchell: "Yes, sir!"

639 Nixon: "Understand? Do it. Give me a report."

640 Mitchell: "Very well, sir."

641 Nixon: "We're going after the Chandlers, every one, individually, collectively, their income tax. They're starting this week. Every one of those sons of bitches."

642 Dick.

643 Accusations by the apologists at the Richard Nixon Library and Birthplace in Yorba Linda, where spokespeople constantly bemoan excerptssuch as the previous one as being taken "completely out of context."

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