Then I went up to Long Beach's Que Sera so I could stare at Dan Lo Fi Champion because he talks really loud, like a little boy, and he's a vegetarian who owns a juice bar and sings pretty, jangly ditties about some girl who has the nerve to not believe in true love even though she's holding his hand, and I haven't had a crush this bad all week! Now, I got in trouble awhile back with the very fine people who run the Que. I had gotten all bent out of shape because I had gone into the erstwhile lesbian bar one night, and it was filled with men who were there for—of all het, sexist things—a bachelor party. Did I ever let the world know about it! But the people at the Que pointed out that it was a bachelor party for both the bride and the groom, and while it historically was a lesbian bar, everyone's welcome there. "It's a peoplebar," they said, all mad. And it's actually true. But on this night, which happened to be Long Beach Gay Pride Parade Eve? It was a night of a thousand lesbian breasts! Awww, yeeeah! And as rowdy lesbians chased one another throughout the bar and tried to pants one another, I thought, "Hey, look at all the lesbian breasts!" But then Fuzz came on, and they're cool, eclectic, Beck-like and weird, but they sure can kill a room of lesbians out for a night of rowdy pantsing.
That was all in one day! Whew! And hey, Dan Lo Fi Champion: Ibelieve in true love!