'School's out Forever'

I have no idea what you just said. What I know is that Marilyn Manson is killing kids.

Really?

That's what our preliminary evidence shows. We talked to 23 kids at Corona del Mar High School and University High School in Irvine-two schools remarkably like Columbine. And a significant portion of them said that Marilyn Manson made the kind of music most likely to make someone kill.

How many said that?

Nine-almost 40 percent. I would allow that this is preliminary, but I think it's clear this woman is having a devastating effect on our children. Which, by the way, is just a trend I've noticed for some time.

And that is . . .

Any time women get involved with rock music, the results are usually tragic. You look as far back as the rise of Janis Joplin, and it coincides with rising U.S. losses in Vietnam. Now there's this Marilyn Manson. To be honest, I was surprised. I thought we'd hear more about Alanis Morrisette pushing kids over the edge. But the more I thought about it, I think Alanis Morrisette would probably only make kids want to kill themselves.

Marilyn Manson is a guy.

Say what?

Marilyn Manson is a guy. The name is an affectation.

Oh, like Alice Cooper?

Exactly like Alice Cooper. Totally, completely, absolutely a carbon copy of Alice Cooper.

Did you know that Captain Kangaroo is Alice Cooper's dad?

Yeah, I've heard that, but I don't think . . .

Remember "School's Out"? Man, I loved that song. "School's been blown to pieces." Man, I loved that song. "School's out com-PLETELY." Ah, they don't write them like that anymore.

Research assistance by Jake Sager, an authentic high school student.